World of Warcraft and the Single Girl
I’m gonna make this post a little personal today. I have several inspirations. One, I am currently one month shy of my 30th birthday — single and never married with no kids. Valentine’s day is right around the corner – it always manages to make you feel relationship-retarded in one way or another (whether attached or single). And Beru had a wonderful and heartfelt post that she made last week.
My last boyfriend (the controlling, self-absorbed prick) and I were together for 4 years. After I left him, I moved in with my old roommate from college. She introduced me to WoW and the rest, they say, is history.
When I think back, most of the boyfriends/relationships that I’ve had in my life I’ve met while participating in hobbies that I was into at the time. My highschool boyfriend and I met during a retreat for the church youth group I was involved in at the time. As most highschool romances go, things fizzled as we went off to college to start new lives/identities.
In college I was highly involved in my sorority. At one point I was living “the dream.” I was president of my house, dating the tall and handsome president of one of the best fraternities on campus. I was the envy of other girls. We went to date functions together, I was there to root him on during his intramural games, he took me on vacations during spring break/winter break. Really, it’s was how I always dreamed it was going to be. Then, in the summer before my senior year, he dumped me. I’ve never been more devastated. I think it was mainly because it was the first time I had really felt love/been in love with someone. It’s hard to ever see yourself happy with anyone else when you truly believed you had already found that one person that was right for you. But sometimes, things just don’t work out as you have them planned to.
Fast forward a year or so, and my next boyfriend I met out at a karaoke bar that I frequented. (I got really into karaoke for a while there, and seriously, it draws quite a unique group of “regulars”). As my love for karaoke fizzled, so did my relationship. Shortly there after, I started playing poker very regularly, where I met the controlling, self-absorbed prick, we know how that goes… and here I am today. Single, and with a new hobby.
I have a point here with all this background, I promise. So I got to thinking the other day about why it is that in the last two years I haven’t met somebody. I have had dates, even sexual relations (gasp!) but no real long-lasting connections.
For the last two years my hobby has been World of Warcraft. I enjoy the play style, the challenge, the atmosphere and the people I have met because of it. It takes up a lot of my free time, which in the past has been any of a number of things. Yes, at times it was TV, at times it was sorority life, at times it was karaoke and at times it was poker.
Is my interest in playing World of Warcraft restricting my romantic possibilities?
I sorta think it is.
Yes, ok, I know where you are at now… “How about you just meet someone in WoW?” So let’s talk about meeting someone in World of Warcraft.
I would not shy away from this possibility. I feel like, look… I’m normal, well-socialized own my own house/car/have a good career, I’m disease free and mentally stable AND I play World of Warcraft. I’m sure there are plenty of guys I interact with online that are in the same boat as I.
And interact I do. Being a single girl, in a guild filled with mostly single men does have its perks. There is always flirtation going on. All people love to flirt. When someone shows interest in you it’s flattering. I have always been a big flirt, and as we all know that flirting can be quite the ego boost, it makes you feel wanted, it just feels good, period.
So here I am, getting these good feelings by interactions I’m having with guild members. Some of my romantic/relationship needs are being met. Is this causing me to not go else where to seek out flirtation and in turn the reason I’m not meeting someone?
This type of activity is pretty par for my course. In every hobby I’ve had, there’s been flirtation, romance, fun, etc. What makes my WoW hobby different is that these flirtations have very little chance to develop into something more. Although we are close by one another in Azeroth, in real life the distance is far.
Ok, so I don’t have a good way of ending this. Maybe I just haven’t met someone, maybe it’s just not my time yet. WoW may have nothing at all to do with it. I may be scapegoating here.